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Happy national gardening day 🌱🌸 may you have Happy national gardening day 🌱🌸 may you have a bountiful crop this year, whatever you grow! ((Peony tip: feed early-emerging shoots with a high phosphorus fertilizer for strong, lush blooms!)). Find more gardening tips on the blog, link is in my bio 🌿
Liam ♡ In an alternate universe we would be cele Liam ♡ In an alternate universe we would be celebrating your first birthday. You should be crawling around, playing, laughing and eating too much cake today.⁣⁣⠀
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You should be here.⁣⁣⠀
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My sweet boy I miss you more than words, I ache to hold you. We walked the orchard and planted flower seeds in your memory. We got winks from you in the form of the earth waking up, all the yellow blooms, including your magnolia which couldn’t have had better timing. It’s comforting to see you say hi.⁣⁣⠀
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And still, you should be here.⁣⁣⠀
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He was here for a time. He existed. He mattered. He deserves to be celebrated.⁣⁣⠀
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I loved him from the second I saw the +test. I fell deeper in love every time I saw his energetic body bounce around on the ultrasound screen, I have all the blissful bump photos and I have the memory of his sweet little kicks. God I miss those kicks.⁣⁣⠀
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My love did not end when he died.⁣⁣⠀
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Liam’s ashes, a few scan photos, my memory and an index card with his footprints are all that remains. I both hate that this is all I have left and am eternally grateful that I have them at all.⁣⁣⠀
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I found some comfort today but these anniversaries are also hard. I relive the trauma. The terror, shock, fear, disbelief, agony of being told your baby is dying. So deep and so crushing. Part of me died in that moment, part of me will never be the same again.⁣⁣⠀
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There is nothing in this world more painful than living without your baby. You feel the heaviness, the absence, the longing for them constantly. The grief is always there, it ebbs and flows but it changes you to your core. You adapt to feeling the constant emptiness, your aching heart, your soft but heavy eyes, the shortness of your breath, that lump in your throat.⁣⁣⠀
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And yet, I feel immensely fortunate to have carried you for every moment of your life. I will never regret the time we spent together, loving you, carrying you, feeling you, celebrating you and envisioning the life you would have had. I will carry the insatiable longing to hold you until the day I die. You will always be my baby. You will always be missed. I will never stop loving and mothering you, my sweet Liam James ❤️
How did we do with the bow!? It’s growing on me How did we do with the bow!? It’s growing on me I think 🥰😍
April 3, 2021 • just us this Easter weekend 💗 April 3, 2021 • just us this Easter weekend 💗
I’m not quite sure how she turned 5 months in th I’m not quite sure how she turned 5 months in the blink of an eye 🥺 My Elora. We are doing great ❤️ we’re nursing and bedsharing and babywearing and contact napping and I’m literally soaking in every moment with her. Months 4 and 5 have been the best yet. My body knows what to do and I follow her cues. We’re super in tune and I feel like it’s making both of us happier humans.⁣⁣⠀
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There is this unspoken narrative in our society that somehow attachment between mom and baby is a weakness, a crutch. I say f that, it’s one of the most beautiful strengths that exists in this universe. Period.⁣⁣⠀
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Mama if you’re reading this and need some validation or reassurance, I got you. It’s ok to cuddle and rock and nurse and sing your baby to sleep. Follow your instincts, tune out the noise, feel empowered in your motherly intuition and find your confidence in that. It is so incredibly liberating.⁣⁣⠀
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I know it’s a confusing landscape out there for new moms, I hear you, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and stress that you’re not doing something “right” or that your baby is “broken.” I’m not saying motherhood is easy for me, it’s the hardest (and best) thing I’ve ever done, but when women have the support they actually need and feel empowered in motherhood, that’s next-level world-changing stuff.⁣⁣⁣⠀
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Mama knows best, never forget it ❤️
Pregnancy after loss (PAL). Wrapping up this month Pregnancy after loss (PAL). Wrapping up this month of #pregnancyafterloss awareness by answering my two most asked questions ——⁣⁣⠀
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How did I know I was ready to try again and how did I survive my PAL?⁣⁣⠀
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Well friend, I have no definitive answer for you. I don’t know how I knew I was “ready,” I just knew I desperately wanted to be pregnant again, and I do not know how I survived.⁣⁣⠀
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Contrary to what I thought prior to having my own PAL experience, I was not “better” or “healed” or “over” my baby’s death once pregnant again. I think the only thing I could do was lean into the conflicting feelings and accept that they coexist for me (grief and joy, for example).⁣⁣⠀
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I want to share with you the two thoughts that did help ——⁣⁣⠀
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1. We were not replacing our baby (Liam), we were adding a sibling. Luca would be a big brother, as would Liam. My heart would expand for another child, not an “instead” child. Truly believing and accepting this was very helpful to me in my moments of guilt.⁣⁣⠀
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2. This was the most profound realization for me: That I would love this baby whether she lived or died. How did I know this? Because the grief I feel for Liam is love. I love my babies from the moment I know they exist. So during my PAL I thought, if this baby died too it wouldn’t change that love. I embraced and accepted that. I think it’s actually what allowed me to take these maternity pictures two weeks before she was born. It wasn’t hope, it was that I loved her and would want to remember our time together either way.⁣⁣⠀
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So maybe that is how I was able to survive. One day at a time, one thought at a time, facing the hard truths, embracing the pain of loss. Because, I’ll be honest, hope was hard for me.⁣⁣⠀
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Do I have magical advice? No. PAL was hard, it was a shitstorm of emotions and I feel like I just held on for dear life. Do whatever you have to do to survive, just know you are not crazy for the feelings. You are human 🤍

More resources can be found in my PAL highlights, reels and on my blog (link in bio) under ‘baby loss.’
This sweet babe is growing so fast!⁣⁣⠀
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Our beautiful @shoplovedua bassinet has been one of our most used baby items this time around! Functional and timeless, it is an item that grows with your babe, AND it’s discounted 25% today — head over to their page to shop 🥳⁣⁣⠀
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📷: @mymotherhoodstory
Growing through it 🌿 I was thinking back and re Growing through it 🌿 I was thinking back and reflecting on the past 365 days this morning. It’s been a rollercoaster to say the least.⁣⁣⠀
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Early March 2020 I found out I was pregnant again after back to back losses. I was hopeful and relieved but also doubtful, disconnected and terrified. I spoke in “ifs” not “whens.” I felt guilt and resentment and anger but also was so incredibly grateful.⁣⁣⠀
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We were quickly approaching Liam’s edd in April, a time that I deeply dreaded, and not even one week later went into full lock down pandemic mode.⁣⁣⠀
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I was a total wreck. Things felt veryyy out of control and uncertain.⁣⁣⠀
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I did the only thing I could do, I focused on what I could control. I continued therapy, started using tools like essential oils to help me stay grounded + present and threw myself full force into gardening.⁣⁣⠀
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I quite literally and physically GREW through my anxiety, pain and grief last year. My garden kept me grounded and sane and helped me feel connected to my body and my heart, out in the garden was one of the only places I felt safe letting my mind wander and imagine a living baby in my arms.⁣⁣⠀
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Growing veggies and flowers for my family was within my control and was exactly what I needed in this situation of heavy uncertainty — uncertainty both within myself and in the world.⁣⁣⠀
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March 2020 and March 2021 Christines are very different, I’ve realized the journey isn’t TO healing, healing IS the journey, it’s doesn’t ever end. I’m proud of where I’m at and humbled to think about where I’ve come from 💗
Elora Leigh is 4 months old!⁣⁣⠀ ⁣⁣⠀ MY Elora Leigh is 4 months old!⁣⁣⠀
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MY LORD. The joy and light this little girl brings our family🥺 If you would have told me last year that in one year’s time we would have had a baby and be living in a pandemic idk which one I would have believed less. Probably the baby. And yet here we are. Surviving through a pandemic with a toddler and a baby. AND A BABY.⁣⁣⠀
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My pregnancy with Elora was one of the most mentally challenging things I’ve ever done. Pregnancy after loss is extremelyyyy difficult (for reasons I will go into on a future post). Pregnancy after loss during an unexpected pandemic.... intense to say the least.⁣⁣⠀
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I could not speak in absolutes about the future, as grateful and as hopeful as I was I could barely speak about being pregnant again. Yes, I allowed myself feel all the things but in a way I’m only just now starting to process everything I felt during her pregnancy (thank you therapy🙌). For much of it I was in denial that I would actually get to bring a living baby home. The trauma and ptsd from losing Liam was ever-present. I was next level terrified she too would die before I ever got to meet her. I was holding my breath and hanging on for dear life.⁣⁣⠀
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So every single time I look at this girl I am still in disbelief that she’s here. She is here and she is healthy and she is thriving. The miracle that she is is not lost on me, the miracle that ANY baby is born healthy and alive is not lost on me. Every single day with my kids is a gift, as much as I lose my f*cking mindddd🤪 every day with my babies is a gift.⁣⁣⠀
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These days we’ve learned to celebrate the simple things and the little things, and today that’s four beautiful and chaotic months with our sweet baby girl💕
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Christine Covino

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2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale Picks

August 9, 2020 / Beauty & Style

Yay, it’s here! My 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale top picks- early access begins August 13, public access begins August 19! This post may contain affiliate links.

It's time for the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2019 and I have the ultimate guide to help you navigate the sale!

2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale Picks

Top items I own from the sale with try on photos!

 

YAY! It’s here!!🥳🥳

The NSALE (Nordstrom Anniversary Sale) is traditionally a great time to snag fall wardrobe pieces as well as home, beauty and baby gear items at deeply discounted prices!

Personally, I’m not going to crazy with the sale this year, there are a few items on my wishlist, but I definitely have gone wild in the past when there were items our family needed/items I fell in love with!

This year thanks to the pre-sale preview Nordstrom offered I was able to sort through early and link up my top picks, I inked a combo of some year-after-year staples that I’ve invested in and stand by as well as some new pieces I think you guys would LOVE!

No try on this year either but I will hop on stories during public access day to show you guys some of the favorites I’ve snagged in the past!

Everything listed below are my tried and true hands down recommended sale picks, I included my top items I own from the sale with try on photos!

Items In My Cart

What I’m snagging during the sale!

Or, scroll down for all my top picks by category!

 

2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale Top Picks

Top items I own from the sale with try on photos!

My absolute top three picks for the sale are the SPANX faux leather leggings ($65), Barefoot Dreams cardigan ($66) and the beautiful Kennebunk Plush Throw for under $25!!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Spanx Faux Leather Leggings // $65 (reg. $98)

THE HOLY GRAIL FOR UNDER $65!!!!!

These are the BEST, no BS, they are so worth the hype! Super versatile and suck you in nicely. Highly recommend snagging these now for this price!

Check out THIS POST where I styled them multiple ways for fall!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Barefoot Dreams CozyChic Long Lite Cardigan // $66 (reg. $114)

The 2020 price is $14 cheaper than 2019, this is the lowest price I’ve ever seen WOOO!!

Oh just the coziest and softest cardigan you’ll ever feel! Seriously. Not kidding. If you have never felt the amazingness that is Barefoot Dreams, I am sorry friend, you are missing out!

Of all my BFD cardigans, I gravitate towards this one the most, I wear my normal size! Treat yourself you guys, this one is so worth it, especially being almost half price!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Barefoot Dreams Cardigan // $69 (reg. $116)

Soft and lightweight, this is the perfect cardigan for lounging around the house or running errands! Wearing my normal size, medium. Signature BFD softness and coziness!!

Hidden Wedge Sneakers // $50 (reg. $100)

I LOVE these! They can be styled multiple ways and can be either casual or a little more dressy. I have nothing like this in my wardrobe but I can definitely see myself wearing these Fall through Spring. They are also superrrr comfy with a slight platform. I got my normal size!

Nordstrom Sale Picks: Home, Beauty & Baby Gear

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Kennebunk Plush Throw // $25 (reg. $40)

SOFTEST ever and only $25! Plus they have a TON of colors to choose from! I have the light pink peony (of course haha) and white. Please, treat yourself to this luxury goodness )without the price tag) my friends!!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Barefoot Dreams Blanket // $120 (reg. $180)

Lovelovelove this soft and dreamy blanket!

PRO TIP: If this blanket comes back into stock and you’ve been eyeing it, grab it in WHATEVER color they have! That’s what I did and I just plan on exchanging it for the color I actually wanted after the sale when it comes back fully into stock! Nordstrom is AMAZING with returns, even months later. It’s one of the reasons I’m a loyal customer!

Also pictured: Kennebunk blanket and heart pillow (sold out)

Essential Oil Diffuser // $46 (reg. $70)

This diffuser is SO pretty, I love that it’s ceramic, it lights up if you want and it can diffuse for hourssssss!

BeautyBio GloPro Microneedling Set // $179 (reg. $318)

This is my holy grail facial tool! The benefits of microneedling are profound and this kit is worth it because you are able to do it in your own home without the high price tag!

Don’t get me wrong, nothing beats a professional microneedling treatment, but we all can’t do those all the time and this at-home tool can help deliver the same benefits in the mean time!

Read more about the benefits of microneedling HERE! My own story is that I had horrible cystic acne and scars on my cheeks about five years ago. I tried everything, then as a last resort went for three treatments of microneedling at local medusa over the course of 6 months. Guys, my acned scars CLEARED UP. And has never come back! It was CRAZY!! Needless to say, I am a firm believer now and will never not use my GloPro!!

Cubic Zirconia Ear Crawlers // $25 (reg. $40)

Legit wear these everyday, I have the rose gold!

Madewell Leather Tote // $120 (reg. $188)

I die over this bag each season, SO GOOD!!

NUNA RAVA Convertible Car Seat // $375 (reg. $500)

I absolutely love NUNA carseats – not only are they safe (both structurally and fabric-wise, aka no harmful chemicals) but they’re also super sleek looking – pretty and functional just what I like! I know that’s probably not important to everyone but I won’t lie, I like a good looking car seat. But ALSO they are one of the safest brands on the market, we did a ton of research before investing in NUNA and I’m so happy that’s the brand we went with!

NUNA PIPA Infant Car Seat // $315 (reg. $420)

The NUNA infant car seat is also one of the safest out there and also it’s THE LIGHTEST (5.7lbs.).

Plus, check out how it gets secured (the base to floor metal leg in addition to the normal base). The metal leg that braces against the floor was a big factor that made me choose Nuna hands down, no other brand offered that extra safety feature!

I could talk for hours about NUNA but I won’t bore you, read about the awesome extra features on the product page!

Nordstrom Sale Picks: Wardrobe Staples

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

It's time for the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale 2019 and I have the ultimate guide to help you navigate the sale!

Madewell Remi Mules // $50 (reg. $88)

Slightly different leopard print for 2020 but also available in a blush pink which I love!

Mules are like fancy slippers IMO. You get the comfort of a slipper with classiness of a flat. Not to mention the convenience! Busy mom over here just needs to slip into the closest/fastest shoe knowwhatimean!?!

My IG fam LOVED these mules! Last year they sold out during early access and I was so bummed, snag them early for sure if you can!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Hunter Boots // $89 (reg. $140)

Literally wear these everyday in the garden or at the farm and even through the winter! I love the half-calf style because they’re super easy to slip on and off and work with my slightly larger calves. On sale for freaking $89!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Leith Ribbed Midi Dress // $46 (reg. $69)

Slightly different cut for 2020 and only available in black but SO GOOD!

Another crowd favorite from my original try-on! And so many ways to style it so I consider it a wardrobe staple! Fit is TTS and I am wearing no-show undies but would also recommend Spanx!

Platform Converse  // $50 (reg. $75)

Pictured above! These sneakers are SO versatile, they’re comfortable and they’re under $50. I feel like a cool mom in my Chucks haha. I got my normal size!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Calson Plain Tee // $13 (reg. $25)

Because I can’t have too many plain tees, and this one is only $12.90! I grabbed it last year in four colors, it’s THAT GOOD. Comes in a ton of colors/prints and quality has been great even after multiple washes, fit is TTS.

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Leith Cozy Long Cardigan // $40 (reg. $69)

This cardigan is a great dupe for the BFD long-lite one! Not as soft but definitely a similar look! I LOVED the color options and for half the price of the BFD cardigan/under $40 it’s a BIG win!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Zella Zip Hoodie // $50 (reg. $79)

Zella is just one of those brands that is consistently reliable and high quality. The pieces I’ve owned for years have worn so well (meaning they haven’t really become “worn” despite the constant wearing!). This hoodie is exactly what it says – a go-to. It’s super light weight but made of that signature super-soft and stretchy Zella fabric. It’s such a great basic and the perfect addition to my wardrobe because I LIVE in these hoodies all year!

Zella Live-In Straight Leg Yoga Pants // $30 (reg. $64)

(hoping these go on sale during early access this year!)

I’ve owned Zella’s live-in leggings for a while now and even have their maternity leggings (and LOVE them, they’re also part of the sale🙌) but I’ve always wanted to try these straight leg pants. They did not disappoint, I’ll be wearing these nonstop this winter, they are SO soft and stretchy!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Nordstrom Brand Soft PJs // $40 (reg. $65)

SO SOFT!! For real. And super lightweight so you can actually sleep in them. I’m in love! They also come in a short-sleeve nightgown version! For sure grabbing another set this year during the sale!

Nordstrom Sale Picks: Outerwear

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

North Face ThermoBall Coat // $160 (reg. $230)

Wore this everyday in the winter PLUS I twinned with Luca in his (baby version // toddler version)! So warm but also lightweight, great for travel, the technology is amazing!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Avec Les Filles Mustard Water Resistant Raincoat // $130 (reg. $179)

Available in black only for 2020!

Fell in love with this trench and my IG crew confirmed that with their sweet comments! I’ve never owned a “big girl” trench so I decided to invest last year! Fit is TTS.

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Suede Moto Jacket // $77 (reg. $118)

I love a good moto jacket and even better a good price! This one is awesome (faux suede!), fit’s really beautifully, I find it so flattering! And comes in a bunch of colors, went with my normal size- medium!

Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!
Yay, it's here! My 2019 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale must haves - items that I kept - just in time for public access!

Barbour Riselaw Raincoat // $199 (reg. $350)

Available in black or kelly green for 2020!

Ok this one is definitely a hefty investment and one my my 2019 splurges! It’s so awesome though – gorgeous, high quality water-resistant material and functional as a rain jacket! The length is also great, it covers the butt!! I’ve always wanted a Barbour jacket and this one was love at first sight🥰 I went with a size 8 which is my normal dress size!

Born Riding Boots // $150 (reg. $250)

Slightly different look for 2020!

Tried these on in the store and they were insanely comfortable and not to mention GORGEOUS. I love the suede and the low heal, these are my pick for riding boots! I didn’t purchase these but I own one pair of Born boots and they are seriously the BEST!

Scroll & shop below for all my top picks from each category!

NSALE ACCESSORIES

NSALE ACTIVEWEAR

NSALE BASICS & STAPLES

NSALE SWEATERS & CARDIGANS

NSALE BAREFOOT DREAMS

NSALE FOOTWEAR

NSALE HOME

NSALE BABY & KIDS

NSALE BEAUTY

NSALE LOUNGEWEAR & INTIMATES

NSALE OUTERWEAR

NSALE MADEWELL

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Happy national gardening day 🌱🌸 may you have Happy national gardening day 🌱🌸 may you have a bountiful crop this year, whatever you grow! ((Peony tip: feed early-emerging shoots with a high phosphorus fertilizer for strong, lush blooms!)). Find more gardening tips on the blog, link is in my bio 🌿
Liam ♡ In an alternate universe we would be cele Liam ♡ In an alternate universe we would be celebrating your first birthday. You should be crawling around, playing, laughing and eating too much cake today.⁣⁣⠀
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You should be here.⁣⁣⠀
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My sweet boy I miss you more than words, I ache to hold you. We walked the orchard and planted flower seeds in your memory. We got winks from you in the form of the earth waking up, all the yellow blooms, including your magnolia which couldn’t have had better timing. It’s comforting to see you say hi.⁣⁣⠀
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And still, you should be here.⁣⁣⠀
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He was here for a time. He existed. He mattered. He deserves to be celebrated.⁣⁣⠀
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I loved him from the second I saw the +test. I fell deeper in love every time I saw his energetic body bounce around on the ultrasound screen, I have all the blissful bump photos and I have the memory of his sweet little kicks. God I miss those kicks.⁣⁣⠀
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My love did not end when he died.⁣⁣⠀
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Liam’s ashes, a few scan photos, my memory and an index card with his footprints are all that remains. I both hate that this is all I have left and am eternally grateful that I have them at all.⁣⁣⠀
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I found some comfort today but these anniversaries are also hard. I relive the trauma. The terror, shock, fear, disbelief, agony of being told your baby is dying. So deep and so crushing. Part of me died in that moment, part of me will never be the same again.⁣⁣⠀
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There is nothing in this world more painful than living without your baby. You feel the heaviness, the absence, the longing for them constantly. The grief is always there, it ebbs and flows but it changes you to your core. You adapt to feeling the constant emptiness, your aching heart, your soft but heavy eyes, the shortness of your breath, that lump in your throat.⁣⁣⠀
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And yet, I feel immensely fortunate to have carried you for every moment of your life. I will never regret the time we spent together, loving you, carrying you, feeling you, celebrating you and envisioning the life you would have had. I will carry the insatiable longing to hold you until the day I die. You will always be my baby. You will always be missed. I will never stop loving and mothering you, my sweet Liam James ❤️
How did we do with the bow!? It’s growing on me How did we do with the bow!? It’s growing on me I think 🥰😍
April 3, 2021 • just us this Easter weekend 💗 April 3, 2021 • just us this Easter weekend 💗
I’m not quite sure how she turned 5 months in th I’m not quite sure how she turned 5 months in the blink of an eye 🥺 My Elora. We are doing great ❤️ we’re nursing and bedsharing and babywearing and contact napping and I’m literally soaking in every moment with her. Months 4 and 5 have been the best yet. My body knows what to do and I follow her cues. We’re super in tune and I feel like it’s making both of us happier humans.⁣⁣⠀
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There is this unspoken narrative in our society that somehow attachment between mom and baby is a weakness, a crutch. I say f that, it’s one of the most beautiful strengths that exists in this universe. Period.⁣⁣⠀
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Mama if you’re reading this and need some validation or reassurance, I got you. It’s ok to cuddle and rock and nurse and sing your baby to sleep. Follow your instincts, tune out the noise, feel empowered in your motherly intuition and find your confidence in that. It is so incredibly liberating.⁣⁣⠀
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I know it’s a confusing landscape out there for new moms, I hear you, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and stress that you’re not doing something “right” or that your baby is “broken.” I’m not saying motherhood is easy for me, it’s the hardest (and best) thing I’ve ever done, but when women have the support they actually need and feel empowered in motherhood, that’s next-level world-changing stuff.⁣⁣⁣⠀
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Mama knows best, never forget it ❤️
Pregnancy after loss (PAL). Wrapping up this month Pregnancy after loss (PAL). Wrapping up this month of #pregnancyafterloss awareness by answering my two most asked questions ——⁣⁣⠀
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How did I know I was ready to try again and how did I survive my PAL?⁣⁣⠀
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Well friend, I have no definitive answer for you. I don’t know how I knew I was “ready,” I just knew I desperately wanted to be pregnant again, and I do not know how I survived.⁣⁣⠀
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Contrary to what I thought prior to having my own PAL experience, I was not “better” or “healed” or “over” my baby’s death once pregnant again. I think the only thing I could do was lean into the conflicting feelings and accept that they coexist for me (grief and joy, for example).⁣⁣⠀
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I want to share with you the two thoughts that did help ——⁣⁣⠀
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1. We were not replacing our baby (Liam), we were adding a sibling. Luca would be a big brother, as would Liam. My heart would expand for another child, not an “instead” child. Truly believing and accepting this was very helpful to me in my moments of guilt.⁣⁣⠀
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2. This was the most profound realization for me: That I would love this baby whether she lived or died. How did I know this? Because the grief I feel for Liam is love. I love my babies from the moment I know they exist. So during my PAL I thought, if this baby died too it wouldn’t change that love. I embraced and accepted that. I think it’s actually what allowed me to take these maternity pictures two weeks before she was born. It wasn’t hope, it was that I loved her and would want to remember our time together either way.⁣⁣⠀
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So maybe that is how I was able to survive. One day at a time, one thought at a time, facing the hard truths, embracing the pain of loss. Because, I’ll be honest, hope was hard for me.⁣⁣⠀
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Do I have magical advice? No. PAL was hard, it was a shitstorm of emotions and I feel like I just held on for dear life. Do whatever you have to do to survive, just know you are not crazy for the feelings. You are human 🤍

More resources can be found in my PAL highlights, reels and on my blog (link in bio) under ‘baby loss.’

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