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Mental health check in, how’s everyone doing?? I

Mental health check in, how’s everyone doing?? I shared how I’m doing in stories today, we made it through the holidays but it was a lot harder than I thought. I’m sruggling in a few ways. Struggling on social media with the comparison game, struggling in general as a stay at home mom of two, struggling with a fussy two month old that doesn’t sleep, struggling that I’m unable to do things for me right now (like even go to the bathroom or shower alone), struggling with the omnipresent grief and anxiety, struggling with guilt — guilt over not giving my oldest enough attention, over wanting him to start back at school again, over not being happy and grateful 24/7.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
If I learned anything last year it was to accept my feelings as they come and not label any as “bad,” so that’s what I’m working on, that’s my daily reminder. As my friend said to me today, this is hard, it’s the trenches!! Be gentle. It’s hard and wonderful all at once.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Check in below👇⁣⁣⠀
❤️ - I’m feeling great⁣⁣⠀
🧡 - I’m feeling ok⁣⁣⠀
💛 - I’m surviving⁣⁣⠀
💚 - I’m struggling⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Let’s show up and support each other and remind each other we’re not alone in these hard days🖤

Took this week to unplug and reflect. Wild year. M

Took this week to unplug and reflect. Wild year. Mixed feelings about a new year is not foreign to me, this is how I felt last year going into 2020. 2019 was Liam’s year, it was the worst but it gave me a perspective I’ll never lose and one I carried into 2020.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Through hardship you grow.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
2020 saw more focus on me, on my mental wellness + on my family. Less worrying about what people think of me, less apologizing, more doing what makes me happy (or gets me through the day). More of that in this space also. I’m not going to be everyone’s cup of tea so might as well be me, ALL of me💯✌️⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
I’m not a resolution or goal setter when it comes to a new year, I try to focus on reflecting, releasing what doesn’t serve me any longer + manifesting/using affirmations to bring the good. Still working on what those are exactly for 2021!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
In the meantime I wanted to share some of my big 2020 memories and wish you all love, light, peace and healing in the new year✨⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
1-2. Our new family unit🧡⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
3-4. The birth of our daughter, Elora, the best thing to come out of 2020. She is the brightest light.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
5. Luca’s love for his sister + once again navigating a “new normal” in our family.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
6. Pregnancy after loss. Amidst a global pandemic. While wrangling a toddler. One of the hardest things I’ve ever done, it was pure survival mode (+ still is postpartum).⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
7. Growing the most beautiful dahlias and diving more into gardening than ever before, mostly as a form of therapy, AND sharing it all with you guys — connecting through our gardens was one of my favorite parts of the year + growing this community has brought me so much joy!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
8. Finding my groove and launching my oils business — never thought I would make more than my blogging income + be able to pay off debt😭⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
9. Luca turning 2 and weaning + potty training at the same time — his decisions, not mine!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
10. Liam’s due date in April. I remember wishing more than anything for the chance to deliver him healthy and full term, pandemic and all. We miss our boy + are moving forward WITH him, we’ll love him forever from afar❤️

Chaotic and beautiful and hard and exhausting and

Chaotic and beautiful and hard and exhausting and awesome❤️ exactly how I want to remember this day. We’re sending you big love this Christmas, complete with our best “ewie smiles” (Luca’s term for silly faces🤣). I love how Doobie snuck his nose in there too!! Swipe for some special moments/things of the day❤️❤️

⋒ 8 weeks of Elora Leigh ⋒⁣⁣⠀ ⁣⁣⠀

⋒ 8 weeks of Elora Leigh ⋒⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
You have been here in our arms for almost two whole months and my heart still skips a beat when I wake up and see you next to me. You are truly here. I still can’t believe you’re real and you’re ours.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
At 8 weeks you’re not such a tiny babe anymore, you’ve doubled your birth weight and grew four inches — a testament to how much you love to eat😅🍼 (pic four is day 3 for reference!). Your chubby cheeks are also a testament to your love of milk😍😍 The super sleepy newborn days are over😭 You’re waking up more and more, crying more too (see pic three🤪), but still giving us good stretches of sleep (4-5 hours) at night. You don’t love cuddling with me as much as your brother did, I’m still in denial over that! And you’ve broken out of the swaddle, sleep sackin it up already! Luca loves you more than anything and is always wanting to hold you and help me clean your “spiggups,” he calls you “mista baby” and it killssss your dad and I every time🤣⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
I feel like you just arrived but also like I’ve known you forever. Happy 8 weeks of life Elora, you are so loved💗⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
#8weeks #eloraleigh #watcheloragrow

Unpopular or popular opinion? Gratitude is hard wh

Unpopular or popular opinion? Gratitude is hard when you’re struggling.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Gratitude, when forced, feels like shame. As the wise @sitwithwhit said the other day, it’s the new toxic positivity — if we’re going to feel sad, then we better be grateful too.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
The pressure on the bereaved to feel and express gratitude in their grief is REAL.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
So here is my reminder — It’s ok to *not* balance out your pain with gratitude. ⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
To me, when gratitude is forced I feel inauthentic and ashamed. When everyone is talking about gratitude journals and how to “focus on the good,” I feel left out.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Let’s normalize expressing pain and grief without following it up with “BUT... gratitude.” It’s like saying that makes our pain seem more bearable from the outside. I get it. Grief is uncomfortable. Pain is ugly. It’s easier to look away. It’s easier to engage if the griever ends their thought on a positive, that’s the pressure. But what if I don’t feel positives in my pain?⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
If gratitude helps you to process your grief, that is really great. Everyone grieves differently. I spoke about this in stories today and 100s of you wrote in saying you felt heard. I’m happy it resonated, I’m always nervous to express these opinions but there are ALWAYS people out there who relate and need to hear it. You are my people❤️⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
So here are your reminders if you’re grieving or struggling this holiday season, or just reflecting on a hard year:⁣⁣⠀
❤️Be gentle with yourself, your feelings are valid.⁣⁣⠀
❤️You don’t owe anything to anyone, especially in your grief.⁣⁣⠀
❤️It’s ok to feel shitty, period. No ifs, ands, buts or justifications necessary.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Love you guys🤟🤟🤟⁣⁣⠀
📷: @mymotherhoodstory

This photo shoot took years off my life😅🤪 Do

This photo shoot took years off my life😅🤪 Don’t let the cute faces fool you, it’s HARD to get a toddler to stay still and a newborn to not cry🤣 But we snapped a couple gems, these two quite literally light up my life💖 http://liketk.it/34ldF

Just love this little Christmas corner with all of

Just love this little Christmas corner with all of our stockings🌲🥰 Anyone else getting snow tonight!? I’m excited! I love the snow and I love seeing the magic in Luca’s eyes, he just lights up over the littlest things and it makes this season so much brighter for us✨
.
I linked everything I could in the @liketoknow.it app or head to the link in my bio for my blog and holiday home decor post with all my winter home inspo❄️ http://liketk.it/345gU

Third postpartum, second c-section, a little more

Third postpartum, second c-section, a little more prepared for recovery this time and it’s going a lot smoother. I shared some of my postpartum favorites/must haves in stories today as well as on the blog (link in my bio)! ⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Also shared some tips I wish I knew the first time around like to not feel ashamed to ask for help or guilty for taking care of myself. That’s my biggest tip —⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Take care of yourself.⁣⁣⠀
Take care of yourself.⁣⁣⠀
Take care of yourself.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
I can’t stress this enough. It’s the norm in our society to focus more on the baby than the mom but during the fourth trimester she needs care and attention now more than ever. You can’t take care of your baby without taking care of yourself first❤️⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Some other postpartum tips:⁣⁣⠀
🌿take all the pictures and take pictures with you in them, they will be absolute treasures to look back on, especially the ones where you look like crap (I promise you don’t actually look like crap, it’s real life though, which are the best to look back on)⁣⁣⠀
🌿you may not know what you’re doing but listen to your instincts, the mama instinct is strong and it’s REAL⁣⁣⠀
🌿take home all the things from the hospital (pads, disposable undies, abdominal binder, all of it)🙌⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
If you are postpartum after loss you’re still postpartum but it’s even harder without your baby. Cabbage leaves, peppermint essential oil and a tight sports bra to help get rid of your milk supply. Find a grief counselor and a support group, validation and acknowledgement is everything. I’ve been there and it’s the literal worst, be gentle with yourself. You are still a mother❤️
📷 @jessicamicciophoto

How I’ve eaten dinner for the past 6 weeks😂 I

How I’ve eaten dinner for the past 6 weeks😂 I basically live in this spot from the hours of 5pm to 10pm, either nursing or calming the babe — toddler not pictured but equally as demanding🤪 — cluster feeding is hardddd!! I know it doesn’t last forever. I know I will miss these days. It’s still hard. And nope, don’t need to supplement, milk supply is killin it. More encouragement, less unsolicited advice. Sometimes we just want to voice the struggles without being told what to do✌️

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Mental health check in, how’s everyone doing?? I

Mental health check in, how’s everyone doing?? I shared how I’m doing in stories today, we made it through the holidays but it was a lot harder than I thought. I’m sruggling in a few ways. Struggling on social media with the comparison game, struggling in general as a stay at home mom of two, struggling with a fussy two month old that doesn’t sleep, struggling that I’m unable to do things for me right now (like even go to the bathroom or shower alone), struggling with the omnipresent grief and anxiety, struggling with guilt — guilt over not giving my oldest enough attention, over wanting him to start back at school again, over not being happy and grateful 24/7.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
If I learned anything last year it was to accept my feelings as they come and not label any as “bad,” so that’s what I’m working on, that’s my daily reminder. As my friend said to me today, this is hard, it’s the trenches!! Be gentle. It’s hard and wonderful all at once.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Check in below👇⁣⁣⠀
❤️ - I’m feeling great⁣⁣⠀
🧡 - I’m feeling ok⁣⁣⠀
💛 - I’m surviving⁣⁣⠀
💚 - I’m struggling⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Let’s show up and support each other and remind each other we’re not alone in these hard days🖤

Took this week to unplug and reflect. Wild year. M

Took this week to unplug and reflect. Wild year. Mixed feelings about a new year is not foreign to me, this is how I felt last year going into 2020. 2019 was Liam’s year, it was the worst but it gave me a perspective I’ll never lose and one I carried into 2020.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Through hardship you grow.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
2020 saw more focus on me, on my mental wellness + on my family. Less worrying about what people think of me, less apologizing, more doing what makes me happy (or gets me through the day). More of that in this space also. I’m not going to be everyone’s cup of tea so might as well be me, ALL of me💯✌️⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
I’m not a resolution or goal setter when it comes to a new year, I try to focus on reflecting, releasing what doesn’t serve me any longer + manifesting/using affirmations to bring the good. Still working on what those are exactly for 2021!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
In the meantime I wanted to share some of my big 2020 memories and wish you all love, light, peace and healing in the new year✨⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
1-2. Our new family unit🧡⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
3-4. The birth of our daughter, Elora, the best thing to come out of 2020. She is the brightest light.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
5. Luca’s love for his sister + once again navigating a “new normal” in our family.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
6. Pregnancy after loss. Amidst a global pandemic. While wrangling a toddler. One of the hardest things I’ve ever done, it was pure survival mode (+ still is postpartum).⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
7. Growing the most beautiful dahlias and diving more into gardening than ever before, mostly as a form of therapy, AND sharing it all with you guys — connecting through our gardens was one of my favorite parts of the year + growing this community has brought me so much joy!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
8. Finding my groove and launching my oils business — never thought I would make more than my blogging income + be able to pay off debt😭⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
9. Luca turning 2 and weaning + potty training at the same time — his decisions, not mine!⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
10. Liam’s due date in April. I remember wishing more than anything for the chance to deliver him healthy and full term, pandemic and all. We miss our boy + are moving forward WITH him, we’ll love him forever from afar❤️

Chaotic and beautiful and hard and exhausting and

Chaotic and beautiful and hard and exhausting and awesome❤️ exactly how I want to remember this day. We’re sending you big love this Christmas, complete with our best “ewie smiles” (Luca’s term for silly faces🤣). I love how Doobie snuck his nose in there too!! Swipe for some special moments/things of the day❤️❤️

⋒ 8 weeks of Elora Leigh ⋒⁣⁣⠀ ⁣⁣⠀

⋒ 8 weeks of Elora Leigh ⋒⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
You have been here in our arms for almost two whole months and my heart still skips a beat when I wake up and see you next to me. You are truly here. I still can’t believe you’re real and you’re ours.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
At 8 weeks you’re not such a tiny babe anymore, you’ve doubled your birth weight and grew four inches — a testament to how much you love to eat😅🍼 (pic four is day 3 for reference!). Your chubby cheeks are also a testament to your love of milk😍😍 The super sleepy newborn days are over😭 You’re waking up more and more, crying more too (see pic three🤪), but still giving us good stretches of sleep (4-5 hours) at night. You don’t love cuddling with me as much as your brother did, I’m still in denial over that! And you’ve broken out of the swaddle, sleep sackin it up already! Luca loves you more than anything and is always wanting to hold you and help me clean your “spiggups,” he calls you “mista baby” and it killssss your dad and I every time🤣⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
I feel like you just arrived but also like I’ve known you forever. Happy 8 weeks of life Elora, you are so loved💗⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
#8weeks #eloraleigh #watcheloragrow

Unpopular or popular opinion? Gratitude is hard wh

Unpopular or popular opinion? Gratitude is hard when you’re struggling.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Gratitude, when forced, feels like shame. As the wise @sitwithwhit said the other day, it’s the new toxic positivity — if we’re going to feel sad, then we better be grateful too.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
The pressure on the bereaved to feel and express gratitude in their grief is REAL.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
So here is my reminder — It’s ok to *not* balance out your pain with gratitude. ⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
To me, when gratitude is forced I feel inauthentic and ashamed. When everyone is talking about gratitude journals and how to “focus on the good,” I feel left out.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Let’s normalize expressing pain and grief without following it up with “BUT... gratitude.” It’s like saying that makes our pain seem more bearable from the outside. I get it. Grief is uncomfortable. Pain is ugly. It’s easier to look away. It’s easier to engage if the griever ends their thought on a positive, that’s the pressure. But what if I don’t feel positives in my pain?⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
If gratitude helps you to process your grief, that is really great. Everyone grieves differently. I spoke about this in stories today and 100s of you wrote in saying you felt heard. I’m happy it resonated, I’m always nervous to express these opinions but there are ALWAYS people out there who relate and need to hear it. You are my people❤️⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
So here are your reminders if you’re grieving or struggling this holiday season, or just reflecting on a hard year:⁣⁣⠀
❤️Be gentle with yourself, your feelings are valid.⁣⁣⠀
❤️You don’t owe anything to anyone, especially in your grief.⁣⁣⠀
❤️It’s ok to feel shitty, period. No ifs, ands, buts or justifications necessary.⁣⁣⠀
⁣⁣⠀
Love you guys🤟🤟🤟⁣⁣⠀
📷: @mymotherhoodstory

This photo shoot took years off my life😅🤪 Do

This photo shoot took years off my life😅🤪 Don’t let the cute faces fool you, it’s HARD to get a toddler to stay still and a newborn to not cry🤣 But we snapped a couple gems, these two quite literally light up my life💖 http://liketk.it/34ldF

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