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Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your be Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your best guesses for baby’s gender — it’s a surprise and I’ve had zero “feelings” this whole time 🤣 I love hearing everyone’s predictions and reasonings though! Also throw your best name choices at us for both boys and girls because we still haven’t narrowed anything down, third child energy, no time to think 🤪✌️#herewegoagain
Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered this is actually our 20th year together (yes, high school sweethearts 💗), but 8 years married. Adding kids to the mix has tested us in ways I never imagined (& turned your beard gray 🤣) AND also deepened and strengthened our love and relationship in ways I never knew possible. Thank you for supporting my endeavors, being the best partner to me and sharing equally in the raising our family, you’re also the second best flower farmer I know 😉 Cheers to us!!
Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️ Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️
8 months of growing you little love 💕 Pregnanc 8 months of growing you little love 💕

Pregnancy insomnia is getting the best of me lately, but the right words about this experience finally came to me in the middle of the night so here ya go —

Hopeful to bring our third living babe home this fall and complete our family. Hopeful (not absolutely certain) because I know nothing is guaranteed. When you have been through losses like we have, or infertility, you unfortunately understand that the reality is not all rainbows and butterflies.

That a positive pregnancy test does not guarantee a baby in your arms.

That hearing a heartbeat once, or even a few times, does not equal a living baby 9 months later.

That “making it” to an arbitrary amount of weeks does not mean you’re “safe.”

That one good scan does not guarantee a healthy baby that will survive outside the womb.

That making an announcement, having a gender reveal, decorating a nursery, choosing a name, having a shower, still does not promise a thing.

If this sounds harsh or extreme to you that’s because it is. There’s nothing  NOT harsh or extreme about losing a baby or going through infertility.

The truth is there are no guarantees, and as loss and infertility moms we know this and understand it better than anyone. No one can tell you with 100% certainty how your journey is going to go or that it will end with a healthy, living baby in your arms. All we can do is take it day by day, and hold on to slivers of hope, which I will say is possible, and really freaking hard.

If you are in the thick of loss or infertility or pregnancy after loss I see you, I am you. It sucks and the isolation can be crippling. The only thing I can offer is do what you need to do for YOU and give zero f**ks to anyone who can’t comprehend the magnitude of this experience.

Be kind to yourself, be ruthless in your search for answers, be fierce in protecting your heart and be all around unapologetic. This is a part of your story and it sucks and however you choose to navigate it is valid AF 💪

Here’s to us, the worst girl gang ever, with the best and strongest (not by choice) members 💗
Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨ Footage shot by Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨

Footage shot by @jessicamicciophoto and beautifully put together by @filmsoflife_co, eternally grateful to you both for bringing this beautiful and priceless film to life!
Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @vi Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @victorinoxnorthamerica Swiss Army Huntsman knife has become my go-to tool for crafting stunning floral arrangements with ease and precision. It's versatile, reliable and always at hand, making it the ultimate gardening and floral companion.

I can’t even count the number of times I use it during my flower truck events — cutting stems, cutting paper, cutting ribbon, screwing loose screws on the 1961 vintage VW frame! The convenience and versatility of this compact knife truly amazes me each time I use it!

With my Swiss Army knife in hand, I'm ready to take on any floral challenge that comes my way. 🌻💐🌷 #myVictorinox #partner 

#SwissArmyKnife #flowertruck #FlowerArrangements #GardeningLife #BloomAndGrow #ToolOfTheTrade #ConvenientTools #FlowerPower #FlowerArrangementsMadeEasy #EfficiencyAtItsFinest
They’re alive 🤩🌷 Should I do more flower t They’re alive 🤩🌷 Should I do more flower timelapses!? Which flowers would you want to see next!?

#timelapse #timelapsephotography #timelapsevideo #timelapseflower #flowertime #tulips #tulipsofinstagram #growflowers #cutflowergarden #gardeninglife #tulipseason #flowersofinstagram #flowertime #floraleducation #flowers #flowerphotography #localflowers #slowflowers #happyflowers #peacefulgarden #flowergarden #gardeningmakesmehappy #aflowerfilledlife #flowerfarm #flowerfarmer #farmerflorist #flowerfarmerflorist #slowfloralstyle #ayearinflowers
Never running out of uses for my @victorinoxnortha Never running out of uses for my @victorinoxnorthamerica Huntsman Swiss Army Knife 🌼🌸🌺 As a lover of all things floral, this Swiss Army Knife is my go-to tool for gardening and creating beautiful arrangements 🌿 Whether I’m tending to my flower farm, fixing up my flower truck or crafting a centerpiece for an event, it always does the job 👌🏼 Not to mention, as a busy mom, its versatility comes in clutch on a daily basis! No matter what I’m doing she’s always within reach 💐 #myVictorinox #partner #SwissArmyKnife #FlowerArranging #GardeningLife #MomLife
‘Lotus Love’ tulips coming back to life 🌷 W ‘Lotus Love’ tulips coming back to life 🌷 We’ve been pulling tulips by the truckload daily at the farm, it’s the midst of tulip mania and very hard for me to slow down but this time lapse was calling my name today!

#timelapse #timelapsephotography #timelapsevideo #timelapseflower #flowertime #tulips #tulipsofinstagram #growflowers #cutflowergarden #gardeninglife #tulipseason #flowersofinstagram #flowertime #floraleducation #flowers #flowerphotography #localflowers #slowflowers #happyflowers #peacefulgarden #flowergarden #gardeningmakesmehappy #aflowerfilledlife #flowerfarm #flowerfarmer #farmerflorist #flowerfarmerflorist #slowfloralstyle #ayearinflowers
Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your be Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your best guesses for baby’s gender — it’s a surprise and I’ve had zero “feelings” this whole time 🤣 I love hearing everyone’s predictions and reasonings though! Also throw your best name choices at us for both boys and girls because we still haven’t narrowed anything down, third child energy, no time to think 🤪✌️#herewegoagain
Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered this is actually our 20th year together (yes, high school sweethearts 💗), but 8 years married. Adding kids to the mix has tested us in ways I never imagined (& turned your beard gray 🤣) AND also deepened and strengthened our love and relationship in ways I never knew possible. Thank you for supporting my endeavors, being the best partner to me and sharing equally in the raising our family, you’re also the second best flower farmer I know 😉 Cheers to us!!
Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️ Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️
8 months of growing you little love 💕 Pregnanc 8 months of growing you little love 💕

Pregnancy insomnia is getting the best of me lately, but the right words about this experience finally came to me in the middle of the night so here ya go —

Hopeful to bring our third living babe home this fall and complete our family. Hopeful (not absolutely certain) because I know nothing is guaranteed. When you have been through losses like we have, or infertility, you unfortunately understand that the reality is not all rainbows and butterflies.

That a positive pregnancy test does not guarantee a baby in your arms.

That hearing a heartbeat once, or even a few times, does not equal a living baby 9 months later.

That “making it” to an arbitrary amount of weeks does not mean you’re “safe.”

That one good scan does not guarantee a healthy baby that will survive outside the womb.

That making an announcement, having a gender reveal, decorating a nursery, choosing a name, having a shower, still does not promise a thing.

If this sounds harsh or extreme to you that’s because it is. There’s nothing  NOT harsh or extreme about losing a baby or going through infertility.

The truth is there are no guarantees, and as loss and infertility moms we know this and understand it better than anyone. No one can tell you with 100% certainty how your journey is going to go or that it will end with a healthy, living baby in your arms. All we can do is take it day by day, and hold on to slivers of hope, which I will say is possible, and really freaking hard.

If you are in the thick of loss or infertility or pregnancy after loss I see you, I am you. It sucks and the isolation can be crippling. The only thing I can offer is do what you need to do for YOU and give zero f**ks to anyone who can’t comprehend the magnitude of this experience.

Be kind to yourself, be ruthless in your search for answers, be fierce in protecting your heart and be all around unapologetic. This is a part of your story and it sucks and however you choose to navigate it is valid AF 💪

Here’s to us, the worst girl gang ever, with the best and strongest (not by choice) members 💗
Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨ Footage shot by Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨

Footage shot by @jessicamicciophoto and beautifully put together by @filmsoflife_co, eternally grateful to you both for bringing this beautiful and priceless film to life!
Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @vi Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @victorinoxnorthamerica Swiss Army Huntsman knife has become my go-to tool for crafting stunning floral arrangements with ease and precision. It's versatile, reliable and always at hand, making it the ultimate gardening and floral companion.

I can’t even count the number of times I use it during my flower truck events — cutting stems, cutting paper, cutting ribbon, screwing loose screws on the 1961 vintage VW frame! The convenience and versatility of this compact knife truly amazes me each time I use it!

With my Swiss Army knife in hand, I'm ready to take on any floral challenge that comes my way. 🌻💐🌷 #myVictorinox #partner 

#SwissArmyKnife #flowertruck #FlowerArrangements #GardeningLife #BloomAndGrow #ToolOfTheTrade #ConvenientTools #FlowerPower #FlowerArrangementsMadeEasy #EfficiencyAtItsFinest
They’re alive 🤩🌷 Should I do more flower t They’re alive 🤩🌷 Should I do more flower timelapses!? Which flowers would you want to see next!?

#timelapse #timelapsephotography #timelapsevideo #timelapseflower #flowertime #tulips #tulipsofinstagram #growflowers #cutflowergarden #gardeninglife #tulipseason #flowersofinstagram #flowertime #floraleducation #flowers #flowerphotography #localflowers #slowflowers #happyflowers #peacefulgarden #flowergarden #gardeningmakesmehappy #aflowerfilledlife #flowerfarm #flowerfarmer #farmerflorist #flowerfarmerflorist #slowfloralstyle #ayearinflowers
Never running out of uses for my @victorinoxnortha Never running out of uses for my @victorinoxnorthamerica Huntsman Swiss Army Knife 🌼🌸🌺 As a lover of all things floral, this Swiss Army Knife is my go-to tool for gardening and creating beautiful arrangements 🌿 Whether I’m tending to my flower farm, fixing up my flower truck or crafting a centerpiece for an event, it always does the job 👌🏼 Not to mention, as a busy mom, its versatility comes in clutch on a daily basis! No matter what I’m doing she’s always within reach 💐 #myVictorinox #partner #SwissArmyKnife #FlowerArranging #GardeningLife #MomLife
‘Lotus Love’ tulips coming back to life 🌷 W ‘Lotus Love’ tulips coming back to life 🌷 We’ve been pulling tulips by the truckload daily at the farm, it’s the midst of tulip mania and very hard for me to slow down but this time lapse was calling my name today!

#timelapse #timelapsephotography #timelapsevideo #timelapseflower #flowertime #tulips #tulipsofinstagram #growflowers #cutflowergarden #gardeninglife #tulipseason #flowersofinstagram #flowertime #floraleducation #flowers #flowerphotography #localflowers #slowflowers #happyflowers #peacefulgarden #flowergarden #gardeningmakesmehappy #aflowerfilledlife #flowerfarm #flowerfarmer #farmerflorist #flowerfarmerflorist #slowfloralstyle #ayearinflowers
My two best garden buddies 🥰🌿 who am I kiddi My two best garden buddies 🥰🌿 who am I kidding they trample my plants, eat the dirt and have watering hose battles 🤣 I wouldn’t have it any other way tho!! Happy Earth Day flower friends, babies & dirt forever ✌️🌎🌷#earthdayeveryday #flowerfriends #gardenkids
Who knew my trusty @victorinoxnorthamerica Swiss A Who knew my trusty @victorinoxnorthamerica Swiss Army Huntsman knife could be my secret weapon in the garden!? From starting seeds, to dividing dahlia tubers, to planting, to flower harvesting and arranging, this baby can do it all — she’s the ultimate every day gardening tool 💐🌻🌿

Between the knife, saw, corkscrew and screwdriver I’ve been using her multiple times a day both at home and in the garden; not to mention she’s equipped with 15 total tools, including a scissor and tweezer, AND she’s compact enough to fit right in my pocket or purse, she comes everywhere with me! #myVictorinox #sponsored
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Christine Covino

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9 Ways to Recognize the Grieving Mother on Mother’s Day

May 6, 2020 / Baby Loss

This post may contain affiliate links.

9 Ways to Recognize the Grieving Mother on Mother’s Day

It’s no secret that Mother’s Day is a hard day for many women, but no woman should have to feel alone. She may have had a miscarriage, a stillbirth, a termination for medical reasons, she may have lost a living infant or child or she may be trying to conceive without success. All of these women are still mothers in my eyes and they deserve to be honored alongside mothers of living children.

I think it’s easy for people to think the holiday is too painful for grieving mothers and they don’t want to “remind” them of what they lost. But let me explain one thing, you can never remind us of something we carry with us and think about every second of everyday. The acknowledgment means more than you know, staying silent is what hurts. Avoidance is what makes us feel lonelier than ever, especially on a holiday meant to celebrate the very thing we are grieving.

Bereaved Mother’s Day this year is Sunday May 3rd, you can honor your friend or family member on this day, or if you miss it you can still honor her on regular Mother’s Day. Even if she is trying to distance herself from the holiday there are still ways you can let her know you’re thinking of her and provide comfort. Believe me, even the simplest text speaks volumes.

How to Recognize the Grieving Mother on Mother’s Day

Basically you just want to let her know you’re thinking about her, here are some of my suggestions.

1. Talk About Their Baby

Mentioning a mother’s child will never hurt them. It’s ok and good to acknowledge them, especially by name if they have a name. You can let them know that you are so sorry their baby isn’t here, that you know they are missing them and you can’t imagine the pain. That their child is so loved and so missed. However you choose to reach out, make sure you mention their baby or child who died.

For infertility moms you can mention that you know how much they are longing for a child. But if I may, I would suggest not offering empty promises like, “I know you will be a mother one day.” No one in this world can make that promise to them. Instead I would offer to sit in their pain with them, acknowledge their grief and how hard they are struggling and offer to pray or keep them in your thoughts.

2. Tell Them They are a Wonderful Mother

Whether a mom has had a miscarriage, stillbirth, tfmr, infant loss, child loss, failed IVF and IUI, they are still mothers and deserve to be honored as such, even if they have zero living children.

The mother who is grieving is defying all known rules of love and expectations, she is loving and longing for a child she cannot or can no longer touch. She may be parenting her living children while also parenting her invisible babies. Whichever way she is grieving it’s a tough job and she deserves recognition.

3. Send Her a Quote/Article/Book on Grief

One of the most meaningful things a friend sent me was a quote from the book, You Are The Mother of All Mothers, by Angela Miller. I ended up purchasing the book and it has been the most comforting piece of literature I’ve ever read. Read an excerpt HERE.

Another friend sent me the quote below and again, I can’t tell you how profoundly it touched me. Not only the words of the quote but that my friend thought of me when she saw it and thought to tell me.

“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” -Jamie Anderson

4. Do Something in Their Child’s Name

There are so many different acts of kindness you can perform in the name of someone you wish to honor. This is a great idea to honor mothers and their lost babies and children. You can even leave a note in a coffee shop or dressing room celebrating all the remarkable mothers you know, sharing your act of kindness with them and showing them what wonderful things their motherhood inspires.

You can also donate to a charity that holds meaning for the mother in the child’s name, there are so many great ones out there for pregnancy loss, child loss and infertility.

5. Send a Text Message or Email

Sometimes those simple three-word texts mean the absolute world to people in grief. It’s extremely comforting to know friends are thinking of you or prayer for you or simply that they love you during your hardest times. It could even just be a couple emojis. Hearing from loved ones can make the loneliest days so much lighter and brighter for the grieving mom.

6. Send a Card

There are many card options specifically for bereaved mothers, I found some really beautiful ones on this Etsy page. Even a blank card is a great place to start if you don’t find one with an appropriate message, sometimes physically writing your words out is one of the most thoughtful gestures.

These two pieces of art are now some of my most prized possessions and bring me so much comfort.

7. Send Flowers or a Small Gift

Flower delivery services have made it super easy to get flowers to your loved ones quickly, my favorites are Urban Stems and Farm Girl Flowers. Or of course stop by your local florist or flower truck and hand deliver and hand wrapped bouquet with a personal touch.

A small gift is always an appreciated and meaningful gesture too if you can swing it – a necklace or piece of jewelry with their child’s initial or birthstone, maybe a set of energy healing crystals, a plant, a piece of art, or a comforting figurine like the Japanese bodhisattva for baby loss, Jizo.

8. Invite Them to do Something

This one is tricky, there is a very good chance they will say no, they could be wanting the solace of physically being alone. But there is also a chance they will say yes, they might welcome the opportunity to leave the house, not having wanted to do it alone, even just to grab a coffee.

Either way this is one of those cases of, “It’s the thought that counts,” and whatever their answer, they will surely be grateful to have been considered.

9. Be Their Advocate

Chances are, if you are reading articles like this, you care very much about the grieving mother you know. It is also very possible that you know others who care about this mother too. In addition to reaching out to the mother, reach out to their other friends and family. Encourage them to honor their loved one and remember her on Mother’s Day.

However you choose to reach out this Mother’s Day, please know that you are doing something very important.

You are taking a moment to acknowledge the motherhood of a mother who is often forgotten. It’s important that even the mother who is missing their child is never made to feel alone.

 

Thank you for reading, leave me a comment below about ways you’ve recognized a grieving mother!

For more of my posts on baby loss, click here.

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Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your be Feeling ready to meet this babe!!! Give us your best guesses for baby’s gender — it’s a surprise and I’ve had zero “feelings” this whole time 🤣 I love hearing everyone’s predictions and reasonings though! Also throw your best name choices at us for both boys and girls because we still haven’t narrowed anything down, third child energy, no time to think 🤪✌️#herewegoagain
Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered Happy Anniversary to my guy 💕✨ We remembered this is actually our 20th year together (yes, high school sweethearts 💗), but 8 years married. Adding kids to the mix has tested us in ways I never imagined (& turned your beard gray 🤣) AND also deepened and strengthened our love and relationship in ways I never knew possible. Thank you for supporting my endeavors, being the best partner to me and sharing equally in the raising our family, you’re also the second best flower farmer I know 😉 Cheers to us!!
Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️ Still in summer mode over here ☀️✌️
8 months of growing you little love 💕 Pregnanc 8 months of growing you little love 💕

Pregnancy insomnia is getting the best of me lately, but the right words about this experience finally came to me in the middle of the night so here ya go —

Hopeful to bring our third living babe home this fall and complete our family. Hopeful (not absolutely certain) because I know nothing is guaranteed. When you have been through losses like we have, or infertility, you unfortunately understand that the reality is not all rainbows and butterflies.

That a positive pregnancy test does not guarantee a baby in your arms.

That hearing a heartbeat once, or even a few times, does not equal a living baby 9 months later.

That “making it” to an arbitrary amount of weeks does not mean you’re “safe.”

That one good scan does not guarantee a healthy baby that will survive outside the womb.

That making an announcement, having a gender reveal, decorating a nursery, choosing a name, having a shower, still does not promise a thing.

If this sounds harsh or extreme to you that’s because it is. There’s nothing  NOT harsh or extreme about losing a baby or going through infertility.

The truth is there are no guarantees, and as loss and infertility moms we know this and understand it better than anyone. No one can tell you with 100% certainty how your journey is going to go or that it will end with a healthy, living baby in your arms. All we can do is take it day by day, and hold on to slivers of hope, which I will say is possible, and really freaking hard.

If you are in the thick of loss or infertility or pregnancy after loss I see you, I am you. It sucks and the isolation can be crippling. The only thing I can offer is do what you need to do for YOU and give zero f**ks to anyone who can’t comprehend the magnitude of this experience.

Be kind to yourself, be ruthless in your search for answers, be fierce in protecting your heart and be all around unapologetic. This is a part of your story and it sucks and however you choose to navigate it is valid AF 💪

Here’s to us, the worst girl gang ever, with the best and strongest (not by choice) members 💗
Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨ Footage shot by Our fourth babe, coming soon ✨

Footage shot by @jessicamicciophoto and beautifully put together by @filmsoflife_co, eternally grateful to you both for bringing this beautiful and priceless film to life!
Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @vi Who says you can't mix function and beauty? My @victorinoxnorthamerica Swiss Army Huntsman knife has become my go-to tool for crafting stunning floral arrangements with ease and precision. It's versatile, reliable and always at hand, making it the ultimate gardening and floral companion.

I can’t even count the number of times I use it during my flower truck events — cutting stems, cutting paper, cutting ribbon, screwing loose screws on the 1961 vintage VW frame! The convenience and versatility of this compact knife truly amazes me each time I use it!

With my Swiss Army knife in hand, I'm ready to take on any floral challenge that comes my way. 🌻💐🌷 #myVictorinox #partner 

#SwissArmyKnife #flowertruck #FlowerArrangements #GardeningLife #BloomAndGrow #ToolOfTheTrade #ConvenientTools #FlowerPower #FlowerArrangementsMadeEasy #EfficiencyAtItsFinest

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